I feel like every time I turn around someone else has posted a judgmental parenting blog post/article/status on Facebook. Or even better, when someone posts something that they think is sweet or they can relate to, and someone posts a judgy comment on that.
We all parent differently. We are all different.
Does that make your parenting style the right one? No. No more than it makes me dragging my screaming child into the McDonald's bathroom to spank him yesterday the "right" parenting style.
Yes, I spanked him. Gasp. Maybe you don't believe in spanking. That's okay. I do. And that's okay too.
Sometimes I give my kid Oreo's for breakfast. Because you know what? I don't feel like fighting with him.
Sometimes I let him watch ten episodes of Mickey Mouse Clubhouse in one day. Because I need to get some things done.
Sometimes I let Gavin watch TV. Because some days it's the only thing that keeps him from crying.
Sometimes we eat McDonald's and Chick-fil-A in the same day. (Maybe we did that yesterday.) Because I need to get out of the house.
Sometimes I throw random parties for him and a couple of his friends because I know it will absolutely make his day. Because I adore every inch of him and want to do things for him that he loves.
Sometimes I sit and snuggle with him and the baby on the couch instead of cleaning the house. Because I know that far too soon he will be too big to snuggle.
Maybe my house is a total disaster almost all the time. Because sometimes there are just things that are more important. And because I live with Hurricane Knox.
Sometimes he wears a bandana and a fireman hat to school. Because he just wants to.
Sometimes he shows the most amazing childlike faith and trust in God you've ever seen. Because really, we are good parents and do our best to raise our kids to be Godly people.
I don't go into the play place with him, because he has to learn to do things on his own.
I don't help him climb up the really high areas of the playground. And it's not because I'm lazy, so I don't need you to look judgingly my way while you help him either.
Maybe I'm sitting on the park bench playing on my phone while he plays and the baby sleeps. Because 85% of my conversation during the day is with a toddler. Sometimes I want to feel like an adult.
I don't make him give a toy to another child just because he/she wants it, because that is not real life. I do make him give it back if he takes it from them instead of blaming it on him being a child and not understanding.
Here is the most controversial one:
Sometimes, I let him play with my phone. But wait, I'll do you one even better. He has his own iPod (which is really just my old phone). Yep. You read that right. My two year old has his own iPod.
He is incredibly smart. And I'm not saying that in a "my child is a genius" sort of way. It's just a fact. He is very, very smart. He has tons of education apps that he absolutely adores.
You know what he has learned from them? The alphabet. And the sound each letter makes. And within the next six months I have a sneaking suspicion he will start reading.
And numbers. And shapes. And animals.
And your mind would just be blown at how much he knows and how well spoken he is.
Don't get me wrong, he learns a LOT at Mother's Day Out. A whole lot.
But the fact of the matter is, I do not sit down and teach him these things. I am not a teacher. It is not my gift. We talk about things, but I do not teach him other than by our conversations and his observations of my life.
Maybe you sit down every day and do an alphabet lesson with your toddler. Maybe you homeschool your kids. I applaud you. Your parenting style is different than mine and I have so much respect for you.
But it doesn't make me a bad mom because I don't do those things.
Maybe you don't give your kid Oreo's for breakfast. Or at fast food. Or let them watch TV. Or let them have a phone at age two.
Maybe you do sit in the play area and climb around the playground equipment with your kids instead of playing mindlessly on your phone.
Maybe you make sure your house is clean before sitting down on the couch with your kids.
But you know what? It's okay. We are all okay.
We are all doing the very best we can to raise tiny humans to be good big humans. And we all do it differently.
My parenting style doesn't have to look like yours. You don't even have to like mine. And who's to say I like yours? But that doesn't matter. You do what works best for you and your children. And vice versa.
Why can't we all just start respecting those differences and that we are all a mess?
And we just pray that by God's saving grace our kids will all turn out okay. And that's really the best we can do for them.
No comments:
Post a Comment